Tuesday, July 10, 2007

De Baisch: Scourge of Tourists

At the height of the rush hour this morning, the commute into the city is already a hellish experience. The Ballston Metro stop is very crowded with folks trying to get to work -- it really isn't the best time to learn how the subway works. Case in point this morning: I managed to get stuck behind a family who couldn't figure out how to use the turnstile. I was already in a bad mood from driving for nearly an hour to get to the subway station in the first place and wasn't really in any place to suffer fools.

So yeah, I lost it. I yelled at the family of tourists as hordes of people began to pile up behind me. Unfortunately when I yelled, "It doesn't take fucking genius to figure this out," everyone else looked at me like I was the asshole. Please. I know all of them were thinking it. Besides, who rides the subway in the morning to make friends?

Anyway, I'm fine now but I'm hoping the following rules will show up in someone's Google search when they (if they) research our fair city's transit system:
  1. When on the escalator, stand on the right-hand side so people going to work can walk on the left-hand side.
  2. The tops of the escalators are not appropriate gathering spots for any reason.
  3. Please keep in mind that this city is a place where people work and are usually on the move. There's a reason why people run toward buses and trains.
  4. When on the train, follow the conductor's instructions and move toward the center. You'll be allowed off when you choose to leave -- I promise. Come to think of it, this rule applies to many of you regular commuters too.
  5. If you're carrying ginormous luggage or feel the need to use an SUV-sized stroller, use the elevators during rush hour.
I'm sure there are a ton of other rules I'm forgetting, so feel free to use the comments section to add to the list.

3 comments:

smacky said...

How about these?

* If you are waiting to get on the train, DON'T stand directly in front of the doors, as people will be getting off the train, and you can't stand in the way. Stand to either side of the door.

*If you don't know how to use the machines to buy a fare ticket, watch someone do it first. Don't insert your money and spend 15 minutes figuring it out. People behind you need to buy tickets and go to work.

*Here's one for the parents: If you have a huge stroller, or (even worse) if two of you are traveling together and EACH of you have a stroller, don't position them where half the route off and on is blocked. (The last car should be the stroller car, like it's the bike car sometimes).

I haven't ridden the metro in about three years, but the five years I did are burned into my mind.

Chris said...

How about this from Karen:

If you're sitting in the outside seat and the inside seat is vacant and I come hover over you to see if I can sit there, scoot over to the window seat instead of making me climb over your lap. Especially if you want to sleep.

smacky said...

So, besides terrorizing tourists, how's your summer been?

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